The next three days I will be out of the office, on a work junket. I call it a junket because I will spend two and a half days out of the state for a one-hour warehouse tour and a meeting that will last an hour and a half. Oh, and then there are the two cocktail hours with subsequent dinners, and an afternoon at the spa.
Even though I am not an executive, somehow I have gotten a short ride on the perk bus. And no getting off until I am good and hung over.
Real executives get rides all the time - corporate cars, corporate expense accounts, all kinds of free meals. One of those great ironies of life that the people with more money are empowered to spend even less. Like super movie stars getting swag at award shows. The rich stay richer.
It has been two years since this event has taken place, and I was fortunate enough to get invited to the last one. One thing that saved me from a potentially awkward situation was knowing a foolproof dirty joke. So I probably should get one for my arsenal just in case. Anyone have any? If you are shy you can always just send to my email address. See, that way if someone higher in power tells one then you can put them at ease by joining in the foray. Be one of the guys, so to speak.
Just to be reciprocal, the last foolproof joke was:
A child walks in on his parents having sex, and is upset. The mother had been on top, so when she went to explain she said, "Honey, sometimes daddy's tummy gets too big, so mommy hops on top to make it go back down."
The child thinks for a moment, and looks confused, "That's silly mommy! Another woman comes over twice a week to blow it back up!"
What can I say; even I couldn't ruin that one.
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