Thursday, November 30, 2006

easily influenced

As of late I have been on a Scrubs kick.  Not the clothing, the TV show.  So far I am on Season 3, gotta love that Netflix! 


Really I am in love with the show all over again.  Quick moving intelligent humor with just enough slapstick to keep it light.  Or maybe it is because I am a super geek and relate to the geek characters.  That could be it.


One interesting side effect of watching the show is that they often highlight music.  And I end up buying it.  Like the acoustic version of Overkill by Colin Hay.  Awesome.  Just plain awesome.


Last night as I was watching season 3 disc 1 Zack Braff’s character JD suggested a Journey cover band for a wedding.  He got teased, then he got defensive, downplaying his love of the band.  Then the Donald Faison character Turk whispered-sang into JD’s ear:


Just a small-town girl

Livin’ in a lonely world

She took the midnight train

Going anywhere...


And of course because no one can resist the Journey JD immediately stood up and without reserve sang back:


Just a city boy

Born and raised in south Detroit

He took the midnight train

Going anywhere…


And subsequently admitted that indeed, Journey does rock.


So what do I do?  This morning I stopped myself from leaving my house to buy, download to Mackie, and upload to the ipod…Journey’s greatest hits.  And I’ll be damned if I haven’t been listening all morning and grinning like an idiot from ear to ear.  Which is totally normal to see, a New Yorker walking to work smiling.  We all do that.


In case you didn’t realize, goddamn it Scrubs is right.  Journey just rocks.

Monday, November 27, 2006


For a bit I was worried I had the bedbugs again. But no no no, just one really really ravenous mosquito.

He has been spotted several times, and has evaded every swat and flail. There is just something so wrong about being eaten alive by one damn bug over and over in the frickin fall.

How do you catch and kill one of these buggers? Aren't they supposed to only live for a day or two? Somebody lied. This jerk is striving for longevity.

Vengeance will be mine. Well, either that or west nile.

Sunday, November 26, 2006

living space

Isn't it amazing how incredibly difficult it is to rent an apartment in NYC. I'm so lucky to have a great space in a great location.

Knock on wood and all.

I've been in this apartment on my own for over two years now. Every morning as I leave my apartment I actually turn back to look in and feel a swelling of pride.

But I think that my love of my apartment has thrown a wrench in my social life. Because I LOVE to come home. In my life when I didn't much feel like going home for a myriad of reasons I could be out on the town up to five nights a week. That kind of life was full of adventure, socialization, and tons of fun.

Being comfortable and safe is the enemy of extra curricular activities. Who knew?

Thursday, November 23, 2006

just gotta

Obligatory post on being thankful on thanksgiving.

I am thankful that I did not have to to a god damn thing today. No cooking, no getting up early for a parade, no family obligation, nada. I read a book and watched a ton of Firefly episodes.


Tuesday, November 21, 2006


Tonight I had to leave work by a certain time. Not because of a workout or a certain appointment.

Because by god I had a concert to attend.

There is this band that I have been digging on for awhile, Rise Against. I'm into punk rock an all, and dig the bands when they are still Warped Tour big, you know. (May stem from my everlove of Bad Religion, but whatev)

So tonight I did my regular and worked past hours. At some point I finished up my stuff and headed to the Roseland.

Yeah, I was a bit worried that I missed my band. Doors opened at 5:45. I finished work at 8:15. But see I'm a lucky bastard. I walked in, checked my coat, bag, and professional uniform looking sweater and the band started.

How lucky am I??

I had forgotten how awesome it is to see a live band. All you bastards who go home at night and relax to the TV WAKE UP. Go out and see something, anything live. It reminds you that you are ethereal, it is amazing.

Needless to say I enjoyed the concert.

A while in, they mentioned they had three songs left. "Yeah right" I muttered. Three plus encore, whatever. To top it off is was early in the evening. We'll see.

Then they finished their "last song".

And the lights came on

There were no encore cheers. No one tried. People walked away from the stage.

Um, it only had lasted an hour. With no encores. And it was 9:20.

Holy mother of god they were the OPENING BAND.


Yup. The band I have been longing to see for months is the opener. And the lead? I don't give a damn.

By the way, Rise Against totally rocked. I loved every moment and would not take a bit back. Honestly it works out better for me that I got to go home a little bit earlier in the evening. You know, because of all the need to think the next day and stuff.

The real kicker is that this is the second time this has happened to me. The previous when I saw Liz Phair and Jason Mraz. I thought Liz would have been the lead...but no.

Correct, I am the girl now who shows up for the openers. And I love every moment dammit.

Sunday, November 19, 2006

sleep and happiness

Again I spent the whole weekend sleeping. Well, at least I did after working until ten Friday night then drinking with RFW until two thirty.

So the weekend wasn't an entire loss.

I have been dreaming a lot lately. The weird thing is ALL of them contain some reference to running. The most interesting being the ones involving marathons and one with my sister running her first race with me. None of them are literal, and from what I can tell they all speak to feeling unprepared for something.

It seems that finally I have shaken the waitress nightmares and they have been replaced with running ones. Interesting. Of course I still really enjoy running. Heck, I still enjoyed waiting tables for a long time after I had started having server nightmares.

But back to the sleeping thing. I think it is time for my annual two week fast; this exhaustion is just crazy to deal with when I'm not doing anything to cause it. No training, no long runs, no sickness. Just time for a cleanse is all. Problem is figuring out when I can do this, with the holidays approaching. Tricky, very very tricky. Whatever it takes so I can have energy to do things on the weekend. Like xmas shop for example.

On a more interesting note, I stumbled across this article on happiness the other day and have been unable to stop talking about it.

Already it has crossed my mind more than once that we as part of our American culture are a little too concerned with finding happiness. Looking for the perfect career, the perfect lover, the perfect life. Having goals and dreams is indeed important, but if you forsake the journey for the end you miss so much. Maybe there is even the risk of missing the best part.

For example, when you think back to the good times you had in high school or college, really list off the best times, how quickly does the end where you got your degree or diploma surface? Are you thankful for those years because of the job you have now as a result of the degree? What makes your life now any different than then?

The bright side disease rears its ugly head again. By nature I find joy almost every day, and am happy. Even will in my next career. Whatever and whenever that will be.

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

joker pt 2

Success!! Totally got my sister with the prank.

See, when she was out here to view me running the marathon she used my computer a bit. After she left I went on to my netflix...and was logged on as her.

Oh, the temptation was too strong.

So I made sure to put some really good movies in her queue.

The Biggest Loser
Loser Love
Born Losers
The Losers

You get the idea. Best part is movies got sent before she discovered my mischief. Thus, the prank worked.

She says that she will get me back. She doesn't know how and she doesn't know when.

Doubtful. Very very doubtful, just let her try.

Tuesday, November 14, 2006


Do you know how long it has been since I played a really good prank on someone??

Too long.

But not to worry my loyal readers! I have just laid out the perfect gag on my unsuspecting sister and bro in law. The plan is in motion, soon to pop...

(And as you can now see my sis doesn't read this often enough to foil my evil plan. Bwa ha ha ha!)

Monday, November 13, 2006

movie love

Saw Stranger Than Fiction yesterday. It was just delightful. Honestly, it just plain made me happy. Beautifully done from start to finish. Really I can't say it better than pajiba though, so just read him while I nod my head up and down vigorously in agreement.

Then I snuck into Flushed Away, the movie that was animated to look like claymation. Huh. It was fun. Not bad, kind of a slapstick rip-roaring ride kind of entertainment. It was hard to change gears after the inner joy of Stranger Than Fiction but it did the job.

Today I'm TOTALLY stoked though. Because finally there is a whole goddamn trailer for this movie. They have been tease-trailering me long enough!!


Today is flu shot day. Is it safe to get a flu shot if you already have a cold? I'm almost better.


Last time I got a flu shot I became deathly ill. Okay, not deathly ill, just came down with the killer flu. But I also got almost no sleep for three days after the shot, so go figure.

Course last year I didn't get the flu shot and came down with pneumonia. Hmmmmm.

Damned if you do, damned if you don't.

Saturday, November 11, 2006

all growed up

You know you are grown up when you will go to work sick but won't go to the bar sick. It used to be the other way around. Or hell, do both.

I am in my fifth year living in the Times Square/Hell's Kitchen area. Every year I am invited to go on a kick-ass Hell's Kitchen pub-crawl. Every year I can't go for one reason or another.

At least I can say it is a relief that it is only a cold that keeps me away. No pneumonia or tummy troubles.

But still, rockstar wants to come out to play. I just got my life back from the marathon training!

Guess I’ll just have to make up for it at all the upcoming holiday celebrations. Heh heh.

Friday, November 10, 2006

deja vu

I was just told now in the new job "dress for the job you want not the job you have." Indirectly, in a group of four listeners.

This still holds for 'casual' fridays.


Thursday, November 09, 2006

not again

Sick again. Twice in three weeks. Only a solid head cold this time, no fever or excessive sleepiness.

I blame the kids. The cute ones handing out water cups at the marathon. Kids carry germs, my immune system was weak. Damn cute kids. Damn them and their germ ridden hands. Damn them to hell.

Okay, maybe I'm not sick enough to really damn them to hell. Maybe damn them to slicing a lemon with a paper-cut then.

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

little changes

People say running a marathon changes you. Pretty much except for the soreness I seem the same, although I have noticed one thing.

That I have a choice to consider.

See, at some point on Sunday I started to wonder why in the world I had voluntarily subjected myself to such a masochistic experience. Not only signed up for that torture, but trained with blood, sweat, and tears to get there.

Is there anything you have worked really hard towards in your life that just sucked when you got there? A vacation, a place to live, a job, a career, a significant other? Do you stick with it? Why?

I know why I stuck with the marathon. I had made a commitment. Not just to myself, but to all the people that I talked to about the damn thing.

But it wasn't just for that; it was also that I had to prove a point, just to myself. I'm still not sure what that point was now that I finished. I had an idea before I ran, but the event itself blurred the reasoning, made it obsolete. Fortunately for me that point only lasted just over five hours.

Now my old motivations are rejiggered. I work a really stressful job to make money to be able to afford my next step, whatever that step is. But what do I accomplish by really working this hard? Who am I proving myself to? I can't remember anymore.

You have a choice about who and what you want to be. Well maybe, maybe not. Really I think you really have a choice about what defines you. If like me you allow yourself to be consumed by work you become defined by it. If you allow yourself to be consumed by materialism you are defined by that, and so on.

I think I'd like to be defined as...

Monday, November 06, 2006

ING NYC marathon 2006

This is going to be a long one, so hope you have your reading glasses.

Why do people run marathons? What is it that makes people want to participate in a sport that is primarily pain management? Even more importantly, why the heck did I want to do it? It isn't like I was a runner before a few years ago. If I played sports it was for fun, competition, camaraderie, none of this endurance stuff.

Whatever internal drive that had been pushing me for this past year me came to fruition yesterday. I woke up at 4am, pulled myself together and went to the marathon shuttle bus. Uneventfully I arrived in Staten Island at 6:30 and waited for the race to start at 10:10. Calm and patient, waiting to see what the day would bring.

The time was nigh, I found the 4:30 pace group, and we were off. Yesterday was a gorgeous sunny day somewhere around 50 degrees, I couldn't have wished for better. The Verrazano-Narrows Bridge offered a spectacular view.

For the first ten miles I stayed with the pace group no problem. My stride was great, breathing felt good, legs felt strong.

But I really really had to pee. In all my long runs I that I have done never had I had this problem. But I worried about the stress to by body and kidneys. Worried because I had no idea if there would be any bad side effects if I didn't go.

So I left the pace group and waited in line at the next bathroom stop. (Every mile or so they have port-a-potties for runners to use). Bad timing, the next stop had no waiting dammit.

When I made the decision to pee I also decided at that exact moment that my race time did not matter to me. Only finishing did. Having evacuated my bladder I got back on track....and got a kick ass stitch in my side. Drat. It hit me so hard that I actually ended up walking up the Pulaski Bridge to the halfway mark.

It is funny, I can remember seeing at one point that I had run about an hour and a half then thinking to myself "only three hours of this to go", then mentally shaking my head. Why did I want to do this again?

The nice part about getting past the first half was that I knew I had friends and loved ones staged along what distance there was left. It was so great to know that people were looking for me to cheer me on. My only real worry was that since I was so far behind my pace group they would think that they missed seeing me and give up, I felt badly that I wasn't easier to find.

At mile fifteen the first group found me, with these in hand:

That would be from left to right La La La, Spaghetti, Gerf, and RFW, with Marathon Man and/or RRR taking the photo. They were waiting for me right at the foot of the Queensboro Bridge, which I think makes the "Bridge Rocks" sign a little funnier. Seeing these guys really did give me a boost, got more stride back into the legs.

They caught a couple of pics of me as well:

(Note the logo on my shirt-totally created by Scho! Doesn't it look awesome?!?)

To top it off my sister and brother in law were on the other side of the bridge in Manhattan! Which is good because that bridge is a bitch to go over, and another boost was great.

Running up First Avenue was as inspirational as everyone tells you. There are so many people, and having them read my shirt and scream "go rockstar!" or "all right rockstar, way to go!" was absolutely amazing. I mean, they really meant it, they wanted me to keep going!

The rest of my race really was me looking forward to seeing my friends. Petey and her bfriend S-man were at mile seventeen, Ctina was at mile 23, Petey and S-man again at 24, Meg Kefel, SN , and Dre at 25, and finally my sis and bro in law were in the finish line bleachers. Every step I made was to see them all and to finish the goddamn thing.

As the race went on I definitely got slower, and I ended up walking more than I would have liked. My heart rate got too high a couple times and I really needed to let it calm down. Somewhere after mile 20 my legs stopped feeling any pain or anything. They just were numb, which was fine. Really the only thing that kept me slow more than my pee break or stitch was my cardio. Healthy enough to go 26.2, but not too fast.

The last three miles of the marathon were pure unadulterated hell. There were a handful of thoughts repeating through my head:

"Mother of god there is no way in hell I am ever doing this again"
"Just a little farther, just a little farther"
"Why uphill? Why why why?"
"God I need a beer"

Then I was there, entering the park again for the last few feet. I passed the damn 26-mile mark and cursed the marathon people for taunting me with the extra .2. Bastards.

I dug down deep and pulled out a good sprint for the end, saw Katie and Scho screaming their heads off for me, then crossed the finish line trying desperately not to puke. Fortunately I did not toss my cookies and walked through to return my chip and get my heat sheet.

Afterwards I got to meet up at the House of Brews with all my cheering squads.

I've got to say a thank you at this point to my virtual supporters! Seattle girl with Microsoft guy, Ali girl and Fish, Stabile family, parents, Kzoo Jen, Jensniffer, Jess, and all you other wonderful people who have been behind me all the way. Really all your encouraging words helped me along as well. Even though it would seem you are alone when you do something like this really you aren’t.

Everyone asks now if I will do it again. Run another marathon.

My first reaction is HELL NO. Being in motion for 5:04:33 was not fun, it was torture. Torture that was completely voluntary. I have enjoyed running half marathons, and I had even enjoyed running the 18-mile tune up. But this? This was hard.

Maybe I could change my mind, maybe the memory of the long training or the pain will pass and I will want to push my self to that limit again. It could happen, but right now I just don’t see it.

Oh, but the best part is I don’t have to run a marathon in the future. You know why?

Because I've already done it. Booya!!

Saturday, November 04, 2006

one day

I have moved from denial to disbelief. What the hell was I thinking??? Run 26.2 miles???

Too late to turn back now...

Friday, November 03, 2006

t-minus 48 hours

Some more fun deets:

My bib number is 30396. If you go here and click on the "Marathon Time Calculator" link there is a spreadsheet that will give you a breakdown of where I'll be when. It also has a map of the course with subway stops listed next to it.

Happiest news of all - Mackie is fixed!! I'll pick him up today and then upload pics of what I'll be wearing. Black tights, grey shirt, white baseball cap with orange detailing.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

bit by bit

Have I mentioned that I miss Mackie my macbook? I hate blogging from work.

Let me clarify - I hate staying this late to work and then having to stay longer to blog instead of doing so in the comfort of my home. With a tasty beverage in hand.

As we approach the big day I have another tidbit for this Sunday! An online pace guide that gives a rough idea of where I'll be when.

Now, understand my GOAL is to finish the marathon. And live to tell the tale. My HOPE is that I can finish it in 4:30, which would put me at a 10:20 minute mile. But I could be slower. It could happen.

This being said I am going to sign up for the 4:30 pace team - so by using the chart and by looking for the nice pace leader with balloons it should be easier to find me, as I should not be more than ten minutes behind him/her. (Knock on wood!)

More importantly than you finding me there is the question of me finding you. There are 37,000 of us running and 2 million of you watching. So if you are planning to cheer me on let me know where you will be and I will keep my eyes peeled for you.

Tomorrow I'll post my bib number and fun stuff after I go to the Expo to pick up my stuff. (Are those butterflies in my stomach? Oooooh doggie!)

3 days 22 hours

I'm in denial.