Tuesday, January 11, 2005

what is so great about reality?

I just don't get the mania over reality TV. I once was interested in The Real World, but that love lasted two seasons, ending with Puck in San Francisco. I have never watched The Apprentice, Fear Factor, Mom Swap, or even Survivor.

I love avoiding reality. I am happy and go lucky. Not stupid, just willfully cheerful. You know when I'm the happiest? When I'm in my fantasy world.

No, I'm not on lithium. I just tend to have a movie script building in my head at any point in time, with myself as the star. Like that time I had the fantasy life of meeting Rivers Cuomo from Weezer. It kind of ran like the movie Notting Hill - ordinary person meets star, they fall in love. He whisks me away.

A really good fantasy scenario typically lasts me about a month. I replay all the possible outcomes and conversations like a choose your own adventure book. When I first start working on a story line I get a little obsessed over it, to the point where you may catch me staring off into space and not paying attention at meetings. I’ll just be working on the plot points. Or a fun twist. Over time I wear down all the options, get bored with the story, and abandon it for a new situation.

This ability is exceptionally useful when you have down time at work or are going on long trips. It also comes in handy when there is a doctor's appointment or a trip to the DMV.

My current story line involves a real person that I barely know, mr man. My first story lines involved me actually getting to see him before I left Detroit. That didn't happen. So now I'm on to story lines mostly revolving around him coming out to see NYC - and me.

When I'm feeling romantic he just appears at my doorstep one evening. I discover him when I am arriving home from an event that for some unknown reason I had to look absolutely fabulous for. He admits he could not stop thinking about me since the night I met and had to come find me. You know I take him straight upstairs to my apartment in that scenario.

When I'm feeling relationship-y I imagine that we start an email correspondence and we find we are soul mates. We carefully engage in a long distance relationship, and he eventually decides to move out here.

When I'm feeling cynical I just picture really mind-blowing sex.

See, in reality this guy could be a complete jerk. He could be someone that I have absolutely nothing in common with. I could bore him to death, or he could bore me. Worst of all, he could be a Republican. *Gasp!*

The general public can keep their low-budget high confrontation shows. I'll stick with the rose colored looking glass.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Wow, who know all of that was swirling around in that head of yours! And I thought it was warehouse stock calculations and reasons for declines in reissued classical literature!

I love reality tv, but I don't like non-fiction books...isn't that ironic?! I am more than a bit of a voyeur. I like seeing into people's lives and I love competitions. I really liked HBO's taxi-cab confessions and documentaries about the underside of life. Anything that can give me a window into something that I would never experience in my real life. But for books, I'm all about great compelling fiction.

That's awesome that you can fantasise so easily and readily. You must never have a lonely night or day! How interesting you are! For real! See you in dreamland.