Sunday, July 15, 2007


I am a big frickity-frackity chicken. Over the last week and a half I have been emailing a guy from match. His profile is great, he's cute, the whole nine. But then it comes to phone time.


What, me talk on the phone? Work without visual stimuli to aid in my response? Ugh, I hate it. I prefer email that has NO visual cues or in person which is entirely reaction-based.

So here I am, stymie-ing this (seemingly) great guy because I can't quite get across how much of a phone talker I am not. Seriously, when I have tried to explain thus far he just says give him my number and he'll call. Which for ANYONE else would totally make sense, because NORMAL people only worry about first contact.

Not that I aspire to be normal, but in online dating the whole phone step is kind of necessary.

(Here is where I admit this is maybe the fourth time in the last couple I have gotten this far and then...*crickets*)

But I like this one a little better than the others. So I'm going to just see if we can skip to the meeting part. Is that wrong, to make someone have to change a pattern to deal with a quirk? Or is that the most honest up front thing you can do?

In case you don't get the irony - you didn't know that I just spent a kajillion dollars on this fancy new iphone (Mookie) which I love for every other but its main use.


ctina said...

As a former online dater (who had between 3 to 4 dates a week for a time before collapsing of exhaustion), here's a word of advice. Skip the phone. In fact, skip all but the most neccesary emails too. Just meet.

My theory is, if you met them in a bar it would be very easy. But, the more you build it up in your head, the worse your nervousness & anticipation gets. Anticipation is a nerve killer. (And fact is, everyone is totally different in person than on phone or email, anyway.)

So, just meet. Save yourself the stress of mental gymnastics and you'll be a lot more relaxed, and yourself. And, you'll get the duds out of the way quickly.

Jill said...

ctina is right- make the actual meeting happen quickly! Then you can 'turn and burn' through them. If you talk on the phone, just do it to arrange the meeting place.

Bridget Rockstar!! said...

Can I just say how much I love you guys for helping me feed my neurosis? *Heart*

And I'm totally taking your advice, even if it is exactly what I wanted to do in the first place. Booya!