instinct

Today I saw DTH guy for the first time since the break up.

It was rough, but not for the reason you think. It was rough because chemistry was never a problem.

Literally we spent thirty seconds together. All pure professional business. But how do you turn off your libido?

Seriously, just seeing him turned on the same receptors as before. It is like I have to retrain my libido not to ignite when he is around. I guess that makes sense, whenever you stop seeing someone you relearn what touching is appropriate again.

Thing is, I start thinking of maybe a hookup or two, here or there. Then stop. That isn't fair, sending mixed messages and whatnot. If there is anything I have learned over time, it is that no guy can deal with having me in a casual (aka physical) relationship. I realize that sounds weird, but if you know me then you realize why it adds to my constant singledom.

On the bright side, and totally not related to the above rant, I came up with the conclusion to my sister's wedding speech. The speech is NOT ABOUT ME. The whole concept is to celebrate my sister via my voice but not drawing attention to myself. (Thus my challenge? Hello??!!??) I think I've got it. And I am so psyched. :)

Those of you not coming to the wedding but hanging with me (Tuesday the 6th or Wednesday the 7th) you get to hear me practice. I have no places to match those dates yet, so if ya'll have suggestions post now or forever hold your peace. These are my two free nights from wedding responsibilities, so bring on your unanswered questions and random thoughts to post.