leadership

Last year sometime I was talking to my parents about being someone's boss. Being a supervisor. My mother said to me,

"I always knew you would be a manager. Ever since high school when you were on the stage crew for the drama club. After one play while we waited for you we could hear you ordering everyone around and you were a natural."

Huh. That would be something I never saw in myself until I was older.

By far having people work for me is the hardest and least rewarding gig I have ever had. Pretty much I have had employees that report directly to me for about three and a half years now. That would be three and a half years of increasing stress. And increasing work. It is no coincidence I was only able to play four softball games over the last few years.

Honestly though, I wonder if I'll be able to go back to normal person mode. It is almost like my authoritative voice is automatic now. The insistance of thought voice, with a tone that communicates intensity and finality.

Will I ever be the person whispering in the back of the room again, or am I doomed to being the one to shush him or her because I am their superior and forced to be responsible?